Little Star

Recently Anna was asked to be in a commercial for the clinic where she gets her prostheses made and of course, we said yes! Anything we can do to help our wonderful clinic is truly a pleasure. We had fun doing this little spot and it has been cute to see people from around town say that they saw Anna on TV.

More and more I forget that Anna has only one leg. It used to be at the forefront all the time. Now, it's more of an afterthought. There is something about winter that makes you forget completely about it. Anna has had virtually no issues with her prosthesis this time around; it has been effortless. We are very thankful for this because we know seasons of ease and difficulty come and go. With the weather warming up soon and the beaches and pools coming into play, we know we will become more 'aware' of her difference ('aware' in the sense that we will think more about it because others will notice it and remind us).

I hear from a lot from parents with kids who have fibular hemimelia and I want to continue to write about this part of our lives. It is such a huge part, though not the main part, of our family's story. We are learning how to incorporate it into our lives and create our new normal.

I love and hate that word.

Normal.

It's such a loaded word. Two years ago I would have burst into tears thinking about that word. Now, it almost makes me chuckle. I've realized how overrated normal really is. How much life and deep joy there is in the abnormal.

I don't feel like I'm missing anything; I feel like I've been given everything.

My Heart

   

(apologies for my horrible singing voice)

One great month

This has been, without a doubt, the best month in the last three years. Not only did Ben finish school and secure a great job, he also passed his boards AND we put an offer on a cute little home that was accepted yesterday. It's hard to believe all this happened in just a couple of weeks.

Originally Ben was only considering positions in primary care, specifically ones that provided loan repayment as we had to completely provide for the last two-and-a-half years of tuition and expenses while caring for Anna. Obviously not an easy thing to do with a family. We hate owing money to anyone and knew it would be difficult to pay that money back in a timely fashion. However, Ben interviewed for a great job in nephrology and we felt like it was the right one to take. He turned down three other job offers, all of which would have provided loan repayment. Despite the difficulty of the decision, we feel the job in nephrology will be a wiser investment of our time and will be better for our family in the long run. We are anxious about having a student loan, and know it will require a lot of hard work and continued simple living to pay it off, but we went for it. Neither one of us expected to stay here! We had it in our minds that we would be leaving this city, perhaps even leaving the state, yet here we are, ready to stay for years to come. I am excited for what the future holds.

Another exciting piece of news is that I landed a part-time position working for one of my favorite child development websites. I get to consult with parents and provide services all from home with good pay. I never thought I could find a real, stay-at-home job that didn't involve selling something or starting my own business, none of which appealed to me. But here God dropped a wonderful job opportunity in my lap, gave me favor over hundreds of other applicants, helped me get through many nerve-wrecking interviews, and provided something that hopefully I can continue for years to come. I am very excited, very nervous about how I will juggle up to 20 hours of work plus caring for a toddler and a newborn, and exceedingly thankful for an opportunity to use my professional skills.

Oh, and to emphasize the fact that it's been a great month, check out what Anna did this week!!!!!!




So proud of my baby!

Sixteen months and more beach pictures

Our little girl is sixteen months old today! She has been starting to take off in a lot of ways and it's so fun to see her connect the dots. She remains a quiet observer and has the most gentle, loving personality. I am so proud of how well she listens and her patience at this age! I feel like all the teaching and consistency is really starting to pay off. 





Sometimes I am amazed when I look at her now and then think back to her first six months and how unsettled and unhappy she was. I am certain a majority of her colicky symptoms were from nursing with food sensitivity issues, which was so hard because nothing would fix it except when I stopped nursing altogether. Praying that our new little one will have a pain-free infanthood!


Anna is really into loving on her baby doll or stuffed animals right now- she likes to give them lots of hugs and kisses! She loves to sit and look at the pictures in her books, her favorite being Pat the Bunny. She's getting better at eating with a spoon which frees us up to enjoy our meal a little more. She continues to get better with her leg, though it's a slow process. I can't wait for the day when she can walk.

We use a silicone sleeve to keep her leg from falling off while she crawls.

My brother-in-law Jon is the official family photographer and I love that he snaps so many memories of family time. I prefer not to take a million pictures so it's great for someone who enjoys it to take on that role. Here are some more cute pics from the beach. Good luck telling Ben and his two brothers apart!

 The big-wave days kind of freaked Anna out, lol.

Which of these hair colors doesn't belong?
Ben's whole family minus middle sister Jessica.

A funny video from the beach of Anna and her baby that she loves soo much and can't sleep without. 

Our Little Deer

For whatever reason, we have gotten her leg to stay on better today! She wore it for several hours with no problems. Maybe folding over the sock helped. Check out this adorable video of our little 'deer'. We are so proud of her!

Finger Freedom

Anna's arm cast is finally off! She still has to wear a dressing on it for 10 days until it is completely healed, but it's sooo nice to not have to get whacked in the face every time I hold her.

The day before her arm cast removal, I took a few videos of Anna getting around with her casts. I want to remember how far she has come and how much she had adapted by the end of the four weeks. Here's a short video of her standing, cruising, and climbing down. She became adept at getting up and down with both casts within the last week or so.



Ben took this trip to Greenville solo. For many reasons, including the opportunity to relieve some of the travel burden by travelling with Shr*ners transportation, we needed to split up the next two trips. I knew I would have to go solo for the overnight stay when Anna goes under anesthesia to have her leg cast removed, so Ben took her on this trip to give me a break. The trips are exhausting and emotionally draining. It's hard to see Anna going through the processes each trip involves. We both felt like we only had enough emotional stamina to take the reins for one trip.

He said it was a good thing I wasn't there. Anna was scared when they took off the cast, but became pretty traumatized when she saw her fingers for the first time. I'm not sure if she was scared because of the scabs and stitches, because they were unrecognizable, or what. She pretty much lost it and was inconsolable for a full hour, crying each time she looked at her hand. Finally the nurse thought to go ahead and dress up the fingers. Once they were covered she was able to calm down. When Ben relayed this story to me, I burst into tears. I didn't think Anna would be so self-aware. I thought she would be thrilled to have the use of her hand back. Obviously, she was very disturbed by what she saw. This has made me think a little bit more about her leg cast removal. I thought she wouldn't even remember what it was like before, that she wouldn't think anything of it. But now I realize that it might be quite traumatic for her to see her footless leg for the first time.

During the surgery they separated the fused skin between her fingers and then used skin and tissue from her amputated foot to graft on to the side of the finger that needed it. In terms of appearance, the fingers will look better and better with time. From far away, they look pretty good.

Anna looking at her fingers while we change the dressing.

It was hard to get a close up of her hand because she kept moving around. This was the best I could do.

Thank you to everyone who commented on my last post- you all gave some great ideas. I'll give an update on at some point.

Party Time

We had a wonderful time at Anna's first birthday party this weekend. Despite the stress of the last two weeks and my questioning whether it was a good idea to have a party at all, it ended up being perfect. We had so much fun doing what we love- cooking out and hanging out. Some wonderful friends were kind enough to host the party and take care of the grilling, and another surprised us with an amazing birthday cake that was a piece of art. With a perfect size of 20 people and great weather, it couldn't have been a better way to celebrate Anna's first year.

The day before I took care of most of the cooking. Considering what's been going on lately, we kept it super simple with the food. I felt proud that I still managed to make everything we did have homemade. I even had time to bake Anna her own little 'cake'. Since she needs everything dairy and egg free, I thought it would be easier to make something separate for her. I turned this great vegan apple bread recipe that I have into muffins, and then made some dairy free frosting (it tasted just like the real thing).



I made a quick banner with Anna's monthly pictures. Here's a close up of the pictures:

The beautiful cake. Pictures don't do it justice.

 


The Birthday Girl taking it all in. She gets real serious.

 



In case you wanted a close up of my enormous nostril-flare, here ya go.




I love this pic, even with the black eye :)



Here's a video of us bringing out Anna's cupcake. She is totally clueless:




I finished the night off by going to see the Hunger Games. I can't remember the last time I paid full price to see a movie. It's been years. I still haven't decided how I feel about the adaptation. It was definitley true to the book which was  nice, and I thought it was a good movie but I can't help but feel that it didn't inspire me very much. There wasn't enough time for good character development and I left feeling like it was utterly missing something. The special effects weren't up to snuff, and the costumes were disappointing. Had I watched it without reading the books, I think I would have been a bit confused in a few parts, too. I did like Peeta's portrayal a lot. Since he was my favorite in the book, I was happy with how his character played out. I also like the portrayal of the Capitol and the Districts, and seeing the point of view of the Gamemakers during the games. That was a nice touch. Overall how do I feel about it? Eh. I need to see it again to decide.

The First Week

The first week is wrapping up and while I can't say it's a whole lot easier, there have been some happy moments. Anna learning to get around despite her cast, enjoying the good weather and her brief good moods, and spending time with Ben. She is still uncomfortable and not ready to decrease the pain meds yet (which we learned the hard way) so she is still taking them around the clock. She's not eating or drinking much and is generally cranky, but I would be too if I just lost a limb! Some cute pictures and a video from today: