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May 20, 2012

Allergies and more allergies

Since it's one of the big things we are dealing with right now, I thought I would give an allergy update. As you know, Anna was diagnosed with food allergies back in January. She showed major reactions to milk, eggs and peanuts. We have been avoiding those foods, and also trying to figure out what is triggering her eczema breakouts. We haven't been so lucky with that, despite my Inspector Gadget detective skills. We did switch allergists to the wife of one of Ben's preceptors, and that was a great move. She gave us some tips and did some more testing, but we still haven't nailed down those problem foods. Thankfully the eczema, while frustrating and painful for Anna, isn't life-threatening.

The initial allergies, however... are another story. It has been quite the experience. I recently realized that I have been living in a sort of denial... trying to 'get by' without a plan until Anna grows out of her allergies. Problem is, she hasn't grown out of them. They've actually gotten worse. Whereas before she would break out in a red rash if she touched anything with milk in it, now she will break out in hives and a rash with just a hint of milk contact. I don't know what would happen if she actually ingested milk, and I don't want to find out. If we kiss her after having a bowl of cereal, she will even get a hive on her little face! When she some cooked eggs for the first time since being tested (long story), she reacted so badly that Ben was on his way to the ER... until she vomited and things turned around. Scary a million times over.

It's constantly on my mind because Anna always has to eat. Three meals a day. And everywhere we go, there is food. Honestly, I think without the milk allergy we could manage fairly easily. But do you have any idea how many foods have milk in them? Saltine crackers, hamburger buns, Goldfish crackers, some deli meats, frozen meatballs, on and on. After becoming an avid label reader, I am convinced that wheat and milk allergies are by far the most difficult to live with. Because they are in everything!

At home, I have been cooking what we would normally have for dinner and then trying to make an alternate version for Anna. If that's not possible, I feed her something else. But it's not working. I either feel stressed out when cooking a million things, or I forget and add the cheese and then kick myself, or I end up feeding her the same foods over and over again. I decided that I can't keep living in this survival mode, waiting for her to grow out of the allergies. I have to come up with a better plan.

Ben and I love us some dairy. We're not ready to give it up. But I am ready to start making dairy and egg free dinners. As sad as it is to say goodbye to cream soups, egg salad, pastas, Italian food, everything with cheese, etc. it is just too stressful to continue with what we have been doing. So I scoured my recipes and came up with a few that Anna can eat. I found about 15, and thought I would try rotating these dinners. That way everyone gets a healthy meal, and I don't have to worry about what to feed Anna. Ben and I can still enjoy milk, yogurt, and cheese throughout the day. I will miss the variety but whatever, I can deal with it. This is what I came up with:

Black beans cakes with (soy) yogurt and lime dressing
Lemon-baked chicken, green beans, and potatoes
Pork and snap pea kebabs
Homemade chicken noodle soup
Mexican bean burritos
Pork tenderloin with black eyed pea and avocado salsa
Baked salmon
Turkey chili
Homemade chicken nuggets
Shrimp and feta bowtie pasta (sans feta for Anna)
Reuben sandwiches
BBQ chicken wings
Spaghetti and meatballs
Keilbasa with peppers and onions

I typically only make one side dish. It's almost always a vegetable. Occasionally I will throw in a starch like rice or bread, but Anna can't eat most breads anyway. Sides will be chosen from one of the following: salad, lima beans, zucchini, squash, green beans, sweet corn, fruit, broccoli, peas (not for Anna), sweet potato, roasted potatoes, Asian coleslaw.

Not too exciting, I know... but hey, it is what it is. I started this week and it has been nice to not have the question,  'what to feed Anna?' consuming so much space in my brain.

I've simplified eating at home, but going out is still a struggle. I take food for Anna whenever we go out. I can't expect people to make a milk-egg-nut free dinner, and I feel rude asking to check the labels on something before I give it to her. On the other hand, it's sort of life or death, so I'm not willing to risk it and give her something that she could react to. It's a major pain to pack food wherever we go, but I'm thankful that at least she isn't aware enough to protest when she doesn't get the cake at the kids' birthday party. When she's two, I'm not sure what I'll do.

I also have to be really careful when I leave her places. At Mother's Day Out, they all eat at the same table. Sounds harmless, but all it takes is for Anna to grab one crumb of some other kids' food, and bam! She has a reaction. Or for her to pick up a leftover cracker off the floor at the church nursery... you get the idea. It's a bit of a stressful existence. I think it's kind of ironic that I rarely think about her leg these days, but I think about her allergies on a constant  basis! I'm seriously thinking that if she doesn't grow out of them soon, I will be pre-schooling or homeschooling until she does. That may sound drastic, but it's something I think about. Don't judge until you've been there! It's easy to say don't stress yourself out worrying, but when you know one bite of food could be standing between your child having an anaphlyactic reaction, you start to feel it (I do carry an epi-pen with me like the allergist instructed, but it's not much comfort). You don't want to stress out, but when you are at a play date and there are little bits of cheese all over the table and floor, it's hard not to get stressed out. "How can i keep Anna safe without looking like a neurotic freak?" often crosses my mind. I find that a lot of people don't understand allergies- they don't get how serious they can be for some kids. That it's not a matter of compromise, having a bite to be polite, or one practice round of eating the wrong thing, but rather it's black and white. One exposure and it's a reaction, potentially a life-threatening one. For example, once I had casually mentioned to a mom that Anna was really allergic to peanuts. Thirty minutes later, she brought out a peanut butter sandwich to her son, who them tried to rub his fingers all over Anna. I had to practically yank her away and explain very seriously about her allergies and remove her from the peanut butter scene. Awkward.

You never think you will be 'that mom', but here I am- THAT mom! Ahhh....!!



I think this qualifies as a rant.

4 comments:

  1. Ugh, Lisa...I am so sorry. What a nightmare. You are so right about it being so easy for her to become contaminated at school or playdates or whatever. It is so scary as a teacher when I know I have a kid like that! But I wouldn't worry TOO much about her being upset about not getting a cupcake or whatever...at least not long-term...by the time she's 4 (like my students), she'll be so used to it (or so scared of the consequences), she'll be advocating for herself. Thank goodness. I have one kid that can't have anything with red food dye...and he is like a HAWK with food! "Does this have red in it? It looks red. Can I have this?" It is such a relief, haha. I'm not sure what happens if he eats the dye, but it must be rough enough that he gladly turns down all treats that contain it! (And his mom leaves alternate treats that are safe for him for those times when he's missing out on something fun) But for someone as young as Anna...that must be SO hard. I don't think you're crazy at all. OK sorry for the novel...

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  2. I am so sorry that you have to deal with this. Like Erika said, Anna will one day become an advocate for herself. And even before then, she will pick up on the fact that she has to be careful with food. I have a couple of friends with 2-year-olds who have allergies and the girls ask every single time before they eat anything if it's ok. They don't grasp what will happen to them yet, they just know Mommy needs to say ok before you eat anything. And the good news is that in a few months Anna will grow out of the put-everything-in-her-mouth phase, so you'll at least know she won't pick up crumbs or non-food items that have been touched by other kids and put those in her mouth. Praying she outgrows the allergies too, and not just the phase though!

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  3. i am so sorry. my child doesnt have any food allergies but i can feel your pain. everything has milk in it. i want to recommend another web site. i do not believe anyone in her family has any food allergies but i thought it may help you out. this family only eats "real" food. basically nothing processed and nothing with over 5 ingrediants in it. i just thought you might like to read b/c she maybe able to give you some ideas on what do and how to avoid certain foods or even just help you with getting different food choices. when i read this blog i immediatly thought of her and hopefully this will help

    http://www.100daysofrealfood.com/

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  4. Food allergies are not easy. All 3 of my children have food allergies. We have Dairy, Egg, Tree nut and Mango. I have learned over the years (after making 2 seperate meals)that you can make most foods you normally eat with substitutions. These are a couple of sites that have really good allergy friendly recipes, and tips.
    http://www.foodallergymama.com/
    http://allergickid.blogspot.com/
    Good Luck

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